Gratitude

As a new school year begins, I find myself without a job for the first time in many years. I’m scared, insecure, and worried what the future may or may not bring. Amid all these feelings, I also have a feeling of gratitude. I’m grateful that I no longer work for a person who has no regard for the people who work for her. I’m grateful that I can sleep at night without fear of frustration dreams caused by a hostile work environment. I’m grateful that the biggest drama in my life is whether our house will sell, which doesn’t involve people being mean to each other.

            I’ve found that writing down things I’m grateful for each day helps me (here’s that writing thing again). Thinking of things to be grateful for takes more thought on some days, but as I practice each day it gets easier. Though writing down my thoughts of gratitude sounds simple, the fact that I haven’t done it for the majority of my life says something. They (I don’t know who they really are) say it takes 21 days to develop a habit. I now have the habit and having a place to write them down was a major part of it. I limit myself to two things daily, unless I’m really feeling good, then I do more.

            I’ve especially found this gratitude thing to be very helpful in my marriage. Going through a midlife crisis often brings to mind cheating and finding a younger woman to have fun with. I’m trying to avoid that by finding things about my wife for which I’m grateful. It’s working, and I must say that our relationship hasn’t been this good in years. The best part is that I don’t have to make things up and because I usually don’t share them with her, I don’t have to worry about sounding fake or corny. Humans are social beings and having someone around who knows and loves you is worth any effort I have to make. I know I’m sounding a little mushy, but it’s all part of it. (Chicks dig mushy guys!)

            I’ve gone from wishing to die each day (not suicidal, just willing to die), to being grateful for each day and every day within a matter of months. My improving health is one reason for this amazing occurrence and I’m hoping that as I continue to heal my ‘old man’ body, I will continue to live each day with excitement. Okay, maybe that’s a bit much. How about living each day with something to look forward to? Not so melodramatic and yet meaningful. I like it.

            If you’re not feeling good about yourself, try to find the good in others. Trust me, it makes a difference and makes living with yourself much easier. I can’t say if it makes it easier for those around you, but let’s just stick to baby-steps shall we? Think thoughts of gratitude and write them down somewhere. You don’t have to share them and you can even wad them up later if you want. Just like everything else I tell you; just get started.